By Devon “Doc” Wendell
Well, it’s that time of year again; Grammy season. So here’s a bit of Eschatology for you. Yes, there are people that I wish would receive this antiquated award but does it really fucking mean anything anymore? Even Quincy Jones was recently quoted as saying “we have no music industry.” So who are these people keeping this meaningless ceremony alive? Well, it’s a lot like the Rock n’ roll hall of fame. There’s a bunch of rich, greasy, old white baby-boomers who like to gather together in a disgusting ego driven circle jerk. They were the last ones to get as much money as they could steal before the music business imploded. Drinking champagne and toasting to the “glory days” is important to these impish old ghouls. And I really hope they have a blast.
Of course the recipients of the jazz and classical Grammy awards aren’t televised and we all know that Fats Navarro and Jimi Hendrix never got a Grammy. We also know that if we choose to torture ourselves by watching the televised broadcast, we’ll be subjected to throngs of bad hip-hop artists pushing shameless capitalism, sexism, and drug abuse plus tons of auto-tuned pop “starlets” who have to revert to sticking their tongues out and singing whiny breakup songs for 12 year old kids. Sounds like a barrel of monkeys huh?
If it is actually true that winning a Grammy in 2016 will get real musicians more work, then great, I’m all for it. But is this even true anymore? If so, how long before the novelty wears off completely? These would be tough questions to answer say 20 years ago.
With all of that said, I just may pay as much attention to the Grammys as I have been to the GOP debates because after all, both spectacles have the same amount of taste, class, and honesty, oh, and let’s not forget rich old white guys in suites; The coup de grace for all of us broke, hard working musicians. Good luck nominees. See you next year, I’m done here.